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After the firefight that was our trip (I mean our high speed pursuit) through Soweto we needed a break from the fear and loathing of downtown Johannesburg. Plus I was down to my last pair of underpants, and couldn't risk soiling myself again. Not until I'd done a load of laundry, anyway.
As I've mentioned before, Alex is an archaeologist and what better place to take an archaeologist on his holiday but to... The Cradle of Humankind™!! It sounded like it'd be full of dinosaurs and gold and whatever else archaeologists look for. Vikings or something.
As I've mentioned before, Alex is an archaeologist and what better place to take an archaeologist on his holiday but to... The Cradle of Humankind™!! It sounded like it'd be full of dinosaurs and gold and whatever else archaeologists look for. Vikings or something.
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Our first port of call were the Sterkfontein Caves, fearsome caverns 50 miles deep and believed by the Romans to be the entrance to Hades. In fact 'Sterkfontein' is just another word for Avernus. In the picture above, Alex responds to a sign warning us of the impending horror of the cave tour...
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Maropeng
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Maropeng is a $50 billion state of the art construction, designed by NASA's top engineers as a visitor centre to the World Heritage site that is the Cradle of Humankind™. Our tickets to Sterkfontein allowed us entry, and by god we weren't going to let that opportunity go by.
Winding it's way ever downwards from the ticket gate is a pathway to the very centre of the earth, taking you back in time with every step!!
At the bottom of the path, 4½ million years ago - when the surface of the planet was a boiling mass of boiling stuff - we found ourselves confronted with...
...a little plastic boat. This, apparently, was the next phase of our Journey back in Time, I bet Jules Verne never had it this easy.
...a little plastic boat. This, apparently, was the next phase of our Journey back in Time, I bet Jules Verne never had it this easy.
Deeper and deeper we went, our little plastic boat bravely braving the rapids, tectonic shifts and boiling magma which were propelling us swiftly along through the darkness. Finally, we ground to a halt, at the centre of the earth. The centre of the earth! Treading deeper than any human has hitherto trod!
We staggered into the gloom, and crossed a rickety bridge. As we did so, the eerily glowing walls began to spin - faster and faster - until we fell to our knees, begging for it to stop. What madness was this!? It was like the bastard child of Ozzy Osbourne's worst nightmare! A passing twelve year old slapped some sense into us... well, glowered at us until we let him have a turn on the Bridge of Madness.
We staggered into the gloom, and crossed a rickety bridge. As we did so, the eerily glowing walls began to spin - faster and faster - until we fell to our knees, begging for it to stop. What madness was this!? It was like the bastard child of Ozzy Osbourne's worst nightmare! A passing twelve year old slapped some sense into us... well, glowered at us until we let him have a turn on the Bridge of Madness.
Frankly the mind buggering bridge was the highlight of Maropeng, so that was about $49,999,999,900 misspent by the government right there. In fact, if they installed the bridges in every town in the land everyone'd be too flipped out to do anything but cower in the dirt.
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The lion shop
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Oh. Em. Gee. I think this might be the penultimate post. If you need to reminisce, you know where to go:
Part 1: South Africa Campaign 2009
Part 2: Kruger National Park, Part One
Part 3: Kruger National Park, Part Two
Part 4: The Drakensberg
Part 5: Le Putt Putt and Spioenkop
Part 6: Back to Barberton!
Part 7: Swazi Black Hawk Down and Adam's Calendar
Part 6: Back to Barberton!
Part 7: Swazi Black Hawk Down and Adam's Calendar
Part 8: Gold Fever
Part 9: Soweto and the Apartheid Museum
3 comments:
Snakes on a Plain: LOLZ X 1,000,0000
OMG Tnk U so mch!!!1
My dear Mr. McKibbin,
My favourite bit was the baby lion. I'm feeling a bit warm and fuzzy towards all babykind at the moment, for obvious reasons. I was a little surprised that he didn't up and bite Mr. Sotheran, but I guess he liked his belly rub.
Mrs. Lily Roth
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